Monday, February 07, 2005


My friend Steve sent me an e-mail today containing very little text (which I will not include here, because it makes fun of someone we both know) and the following picture:

Funny, yes, but this would be a very useful contraption. Sort of a perfect gift for the busy executive who has everything. The computer and fax machine, at least. The idea of speaking to someone on the telephone while doing your business strikes me as singularly unpleasant. I recall on one occasion speaking to a friend on long distance when I suddenly got the distinct impression that they were speaking to me whilst having a BM. Suffice it to say, the conversation was ruined.

The other potential downside of the office toilet scheme would be the threat of electrocution. However unlikely, the mere possibility that a plug could come out of something and fry your delicate underparts strikes me as a good enough reason to avoid this sort of set-up altogether.

Imagine your friends and family having to explain how you died to people:

"Well, you know George, he was always so busy. So, well, he was using his fax machine, on the toilet, as he always did on burrito night, and, well, something short-circuited and he was electrocuted. We still can't get the smell out of the shower curtain."

But otherwise, this is a very good idea. Now if only they could invent some way to keep the toilet seat from being cold when you sit down first thing in the morn...what? They have toilet seat mufflers for that? Well, never mind. They've thought of everything.

1 comment:

nobody said...

I wonder if you could get ass-gasket/fax machine paper combo to go with the set up? In bulk - for those *long* nights at the office.

Oh, I could go on. But it's all really just a bad idea.

And where would we all hide to get away from our bosses?