Saturday, May 21, 2005

Sports Fanboys

My colleague over at the frequently-hilarious The Letter D brings up a fascinating point today. Why is it that when someone obsesses about a new Star Wars movie, he's considered a nerdy fanboy, but if someone obsesses about the 1987 Cincinatti Reds is just a harmless jock, a typical everyday sports fan? Why should the cinegeeks of the world be ridiculed constantly about their fanaticism while the equally-pathetic and socially inept sports nuts of the world go about their hobby without being ostracized?

I mean, essentially, being a huge dork who's into movies and comic books is the same as being a huge dork who's into football and basketball. Both groups are largely male, largely dateless, capable of speaking at length about the insignificant minutae of their subject of choice and willing to make spectacles of themselves in support of their obsession. Not to mention spending obscene amounts of money on merchandise associated with either films or sports teams.

There's a sports nut equivalent for every egregious fanboy sin.

Waiting in line for Star Wars while dressed as a Jedi? How about wearing nothing but boxers in -10 degree weather and painting your corpulent form in the colors of the Chicago Bears?

Chatting online for up to 10 hours a day about the deep, metaphysical significance of Jean Grey's death in X2? Well, how about calling into Jim Rome's show every day to tell him how much the Lakers suck without Shaq?

Speaking Klingon or learning the names of everyone in the Houston Rockets front office? Which is dorkier?

I'm not saying it's improper to mock the nerds dressed as Darth Maul outside your local cineplex this weekend. It certainly worked for Triumph the Insult Comic Dog. ("So, what are a Jedis responsibilities? Using the Force and eating a lot of peanut M&M's?")

I'm just saying that, when a big sports event that a lot of testosterone-fueled macho assholes anticipate exictedly, we geeks should feel free to loudly mock those guys. "Oh, you guys are lining up for Final Four tickets? What a bunch of NERDS! Yeah, I'd like to go watch a bunch of guys I don't know play basketball, but I'll be too busy getting laid by my hot girlfriend! Ha ha!"

1 comment:

Cory said...

Or you could be a huge sports fan and movie could name the entire 1991 Eagles roster and recite all dialogue from the Karate, that guy would be a huge nerd! Right Guys? Man, never seen someone like that bad...(cough)