Saturday, June 25, 2005

Sallie Mae: One Messed Up Bitch

Okay, so on Thursday, I wrote this post about the harrassment I've received from the Sallie Mae Corporation this week about my ongoing non-payment of my student loans.

It's a fairly complicated fiduciary matter, but allow me to sum it up thusly for the laymen in the Inertia audience...Sallie Mae shelled out $40,000 for me to get a useless Master's degree from USC, and now they want that money back. Unfortunately, at this time, I can no more afford to pay off my student loans than Donald Trump's April Visa bill. So, in other words, they can call my cell phone at odd hours all they like, but unless Harvey Weinstein has just bought my screenplay without my knowledge, they ain't getting a dime out of my any time soon.

This morning, I received the latest in a string of annoying, early phone calls. Well, for me, they're early. Today's arrived at 10:30, which doesn't seem early, but when I tell you that it's one of my two days off, and that I went to a party and drank last night, and that the children outside are already very noisy, maybe you will understand why I'd rather not take calls.

But, stupidly, in a half-awake daze, I answered the phone. A chipper lady informed me that Sallie Mae wanted her fucking money or she was gonna take my thumbs.

No, no, not quite. What she said was that she represented some mysterious, yakuza-like organization known as the "Ed. Fund" (or, in some circles, the Dark Army of the Night). The "Ed. Fund" was "concerned" about my payment of my loans, and wanted to advise me on some future action.

The first thing they suggested? That I start paying my loans! Isn't that weird? That some helpful company, out of nowhere, would take it upon themselves to call me early on a Saturday and instruct me to pay my Sallie Mae loans? For no benefit to themselves, just out of concern for me? It's sweet, really.

I think it's now safe to say that Sallie Mae has taken a personal interest in leaning on me for this money. I don't know why. Perhaps when I signed up for the loan, I accidentally checked the "three points off the vig" box, and my interest has now accumulated to several hundred thousand dollars. Perhaps a sworn enemy of mine works the phone bank at Sallie Mae. I'm not quite sure. But whatever the reason, they're after me, and I'm not sure I'll live out the weekend.

Anyway, I explained to the helpful and not-at-all obnoxiously chirpy "Ed Fund" representative that I had already requested a three-month deferrment, and that I didn't really need any more of their super-terrific awesome helpful advice. BUT SHE WASN'T DONE YET! No, no!

"Well, can you fax us in your economic hardship form, so we can verify it's filled out properly?"

What, what? Oh, come on! It's not even 11 in the morning on a Saturday. I refuse to even hear the word "fax" on my day off. Someone calling me, waking me upon a Saturday and telling me to go fuck myself would, to my mind, be more civil than calling me and asking me to fax them stuff.

It's just an unpleasant word. FAX. It sounds like some sort of rendering process or something. "Then, the hog fat slucces down this chute and enters the FAX machine. Here it will be boiled and the impurities will be removed. Please try not to vomit from the smell."

So I refused this request, because I'd already stuffed the form into an envelope and I didn't want to have to get it out again, and because I hated this woman deeply and wanted to get off the phone with her while I still had a few days left in my 20's. She seemed crestfallen, as if the opportunity to look over my personal financial information was genuinely exciting to her. Or maybe they teach you to say that line in that voice.

Anyway, I finally finally got off the phone, and I even made her promise to have Ed. Fund (aka "The 7 Tribes of Kutaku-Olima") stop calling me. You know, seeing as I haven't done anything wrong and don't have any money. Hopefully, they'll take it under consideration. If not, I'll probably be shot and my family will be sent a bill for the bullet. Oh, and that back $40,000 I owe.

35 comments:

Anonymous said...

That was a collection agency and you are ruining your credit. If you want a house, credit card, or any other kind of loan someday, you will be paying exhorbitant interest rates. Additionally, your future employers always check your credit and will not want to hire you if they see how terrible yours is. I suggest you pay them somehow, some way or your future is shot.

windhowl said...

yes but what you and many others have no concept of is, some of us have made every attempt to pay sallie mae...in fact, I have paid out $8000 or more to sallie mae, and guess what? I lost my job, for 2 years and couldn't pay and not I'm $15,000 more than what I owed out of college!! Where the heck do I, or others in myshoes collect the motivation to start paying again? They already just "started an auto debit" on my account for $420 per month and guess what? I make $840 a month as a single mom. I HATE Sallie Mae and I will beat them somehow, if nothing else getting the loan moved off. But someday I just hope to figure out how the heck to get it paid off in 2 years versus the 25 and payoff amount exceeding $99,000 for a 2 year Master degree. Gosh what a screw up to get involved with them...ever. If you are reading this, stay away from Sallie Mae.

Anonymous said...

Why would anyone sign your comment with an anonymous? It's amazing how close that email is to the things that come from Sallie Mae's halitosis breath. We have a Democratic Congress and it is time to uncover the whore of all whores, Sallie Mae. Bush did this for his friends. Any idiot who would vote for a Republican should be taken out behind the shed and reddened. Get this, Ms Sucker, their is a direct relationship between Sallie Mae and 3004 dead and 41,000 injured in Iraq. Bush is responsible for both.

Anonymous said...

I feel the PAIN of Sallie Mae loans!! I get those obnoxious calls every day, on my cell phone, I get the emails, the whole nine. Well all I can say is yes, they will destroy your credit. I know, because mine is totally screwed!! I owe them at least 40K by now, I work in sales, and I can barely rub together two pennies right now to make ends meat. They don't care if you can't afford to breath, they won't cut you any slack, and they want you to pay them just to put the loans into forbearance agreement. I can't afford to eat and you want me to pay you money when I already owe you my life? Yeah, I think that they are pretty messed up and I am sorry that I put myself in the situation that I did.... bottom line, don't go to school unless you can afford to pay cash.

Unknown said...

I just want to point out that it is ILLEGAL for Sallie Mae to go after someone in repayment for more than a certain set percentage of their income. Koldflow....I would call them and start raising hell because it's not legal for them to expect a 420 dollar payment from someone who makes 840 a month. My brother was at a job making roughly 1200 a month and they wanted over 800 dollars a month. He had to fight with them for a while but as soon as he started talking about it being against the law and contacting a lawyer they amazingly reduced his payments. Additionally they can't refer you to a collection agency and ruin your credit if you go through the proper procedure and submit a financial hardship deferment. Seriously, Sallie Mae is the only lender in the world that incurs absolutely NO risk when they lend to someone. The taxpayers pay them off it someone goes into collections....then they still go after the person for the money. Basically its far more profitable to them if you default on the loan!! Thats basically the reason they try to stick people with impossible payments relative to their income.

Lons said...

Dan, thank you for that. It's one of the most useful comments anyone has ever left on this blog. Personally, I managed to find a better job and can now afford the monthly payments, but this is a crooked system designed to emotionally and financially cripple Americans who were doing something noble - seeking an education. Again, thank you for leaving the advice here and being such a solid dude.

Anonymous said...

Sallie Mae, I believe, has a system that they have carefully designed to make borrowers fail.

Please join my web site and share your story in our forum.

http://salliemaebeef.com

Chris

Anonymous said...

I get calls everyday from Sallie Mae and they sent letters threatening to tell the national credit agencies about my non payment I have been struggling with employment with out a lot of places hiring(thanks to Bush's bitch ass ruining the economy) and I have a small job, but it's barely making anything. I've been out of work for a couple years and making way less than I used to which is hard. Just before the deferrment period started is when I lost my job.

Anonymous said...

To the person blaming Bush for Sallie Mae's reign...you should check out studentloanjustice.org to see exactly who, democratic included, has received payments from and now support Sallie Mae. I'm not exactly a Bush fan, but this issues spans all of congress! Bush is the first one I have known to do ANYTHING about corrupt businesses. And please, this has nothing to do with the war. That is a different blog.

Anonymous said...

Maybe you should quit wasting your money on beer and trying to be twenty and actually pay your bills like an adult. maybe you could get another job while you are typing all these blogs. just a suggestion

Anonymous said...

I find you blog very interesting. Although, the company has a good profile, some of its clients are still dissatisfied either with the conditions offered by the company or the level of services. The representatives of the company also tend to come to people’s homes and demand the payment of the debt. Sometimes, they may even send police. On the www.pissedconsumer.com you may find even more customer feedbacks about the company.

Anonymous said...

i support this post 100%. To the Sallie Mae employee, shame on you. It's easy to anonymously post anger on the internet. You're weak, and need a better job.

My wife and I are in much the same shape that you are koldflow. I appreciate your honesty, and I hope that we are all able to do something soon about the

Anonymous said...

sad state of our student loans.

Anonymous said...

http://maps.google.com/maps?q=ocean%20ave%20new%20york%20blvd%20sea%20girt%20nj&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a&um=1&sa=N&tab=wl

Second house from the street corner on the beach is where SM board of directors (Anthony P. Terracciano) lives, and the beach, like all ocean beaches, is public up to the high tide line. Maybe someone will ruin his morning coffee with modestly sized sign.

Anonymous said...

I hate to break it to you, but you took their money and promised to pay it back. Quit drinking your money away and do what you promised. It's really not rocket science (presumably not what your masters is in). If you loaned money to someone who never paid you back, I guarantee you'd be calling them to ask about it as well.

Anonymous said...

...i am one of you's...

Mine is so bad that I wrote a letter to Congress and they actually held a congressional hearing in Ohio....I flew home to attend....a plate with my name on the stage and everything...here is part of my testimony.....

http://www.unbossed.com/index.php?itemid=2062

I'm Melissa Miller, that's my testimony. As far as I'm concerned...the hearing has been proven fruitless and it was a nice 'show' of how everyone in the senate and cogress 'act' like they really give a damn.

I will NEVER go back to school unless I can pay cash. I do not have parents to co-sign...I have only me to provide my educational costs...it has been the single handedly WORST decision I have ever mad....to get an education.

I originally borrowed $21,000 and now I owe an astounding $42,000. Pretty sweet, huh? They want $610 a month on a $21,000 loan...yeah, that makes sense. I have NO problem paying my debts...I pay my bills but they WILL NOT waiver in trying to help me find a better solution to paying besides putting it is forebearance which makes your debt much worse. I was told that I could marry my sub and unsub loans with SM after I graduated from a SM rep at my school when I signed up for my loans...WHICH IS A COMPLETE LIE.

As of now I am dodging the early morning calls, the emails, the threats...it's so old- i can't even begin to tell you how burnt out I am by trying to get this situation under control. Hopefully I can forebear this loan one more time and possibly refinance it. Who knows...I'm OUT OF IDEAS.

It is comforting to find that I am not alone. I say we go in on a CIVIL LAWSUIT...anyone in? I mean...wow.....the interstes rate on my loan started at 28%....get a load of that...yeah...that's fair....

SO....IF ANYONE WANTS TO GET A CIVIL LAWSUIT STARTED AGAINST THE LOAN SHARKING WAY OF SALLIE MAE...CALL ME...I'LL HIRE THE LAWYERS....


Find peace my fellow Sallie Mae in-debtors....loving you...

melissa miller....I ain't scared....you can USE MY NAME....

Anonymous said...

v...i am one of you's...

Mine is so bad that I wrote a letter to Congress and they actually held a congressional hearing in Ohio....I flew home to attend....a plate with my name on the stage and everything...here is part of my testimony.....

http://www.unbossed.com/index.php?itemid=2062

I'm Melissa Miller, that's my testimony. As far as I'm concerned...the hearing has been proven fruitless and it was a nice 'show' of how everyone in the senate and cogress 'act' like they really give a damn.

I will NEVER go back to school unless I can pay cash. I do not have parents to co-sign...I have only me to provide my educational costs...it has been the single handedly WORST decision I have ever mad....to get an education.

I originally borrowed $21,000 and now I owe an astounding $42,000. Pretty sweet, huh? They want $610 a month on a $21,000 loan...yeah, that makes sense. I have NO problem paying my debts...I pay my bills but they WILL NOT waiver in trying to help me find a better solution to paying besides putting it is forebearance which makes your debt much worse. I was told that I could marry my sub and unsub loans with SM after I graduated from a SM rep at my school when I signed up for my loans...WHICH IS A COMPLETE LIE.

As of now I am dodging the early morning calls, the emails, the threats...it's so old- i can't even begin to tell you how burnt out I am by trying to get this situation under control. Hopefully I can forebear this loan one more time and possibly refinance it. Who knows...I'm OUT OF IDEAS.

It is comforting to find that I am not alone. I say we go in on a CIVIL LAWSUIT...anyone in? I mean...wow.....the interstes rate on my loan started at 28%....get a load of that...yeah...that's fair....

SO....IF ANYONE WANTS TO GET A CIVIL LAWSUIT STARTED AGAINST THE LOAN SHARKING WAY OF SALLIE MAE...CALL ME...I'LL HIRE THE LAWYERS....


Find peace my fellow Sallie Mae in-debtors....loving you...

melissa miller....I ain't scared....you can USE MY NAME....

Anonymous said...

count yourself lucky that you got a call on saturday at 10:30 am. They start as early as 8AM on saturdays. So quit your bitching and pay your loan back. YOU borrowed the money!

Unknown said...

i really can't stand the service at sallie mae either. I've been trying to get a loan deferment for 6 months (I am a full-time student) and after being told it would be automatically taken care of several times I begin getting calls from a collection agency. I am a very good client!!!! I pay my bills. The issue is total lack of communication, incorrect amounts appearing on their website, and making it impossible to actually speak to anyone in person. Can I transfer my loans to somewhere else? Any recommendations?

Anonymous said...

I got a graduate education. I had a 4.2 gpa from high school and came from a farm where I was the first to go to college...I was advised, to take out loans, so I did. A HUGE mistake.

I now owe more than my rent. Sallie Mae uses predatory practices, they've had multiple law suits against them, and they deserve nothing.

I've actually thought about moving to Canada and never paying them back.

The thing is, I am a reasonable person and I want to pay what I owe...but it's been doubled since I took it out, they mysteriously never seem to get my salary information (to reduce payments), and they are ruthless.

I'm not so poor I can't pay my rent...but I can't afford to pay MORE than my rent to them. And to the idiot who said we all have enough to have an internet connection...any one of these could be from a library...or free wi-fi.

I have no credit debts, no car payments, and only an apartment...I don't live irresponsibly. I am willing to pay Sallie back if she will work with me...truth is, she won't.

It's frankly, not a big threat to me if they ruin my credit. I have a tenured job and I'm not getting fired. I'll buy a house under my mom's name. At least if they garnish my wages, they'll be forced by law to take only a percentage.

An economic stimulus package that would work? forgive student loans for working americans. I certainly would spend more.

Anonymous said...

Sallie Mae is the one ruining people's credit. I have ran into the "oh we can't offer you any help because it's a private loan" bit. I was told that there is NO interest rate cap. Also told that if I want to know if there was any kind of interest rate cap, to go back to the state it was issued in (in my case, Ohio). If there is no rate cap, it's loansharking. If Obama can suck all the federal loans back into the Dept. of Education, he can take back Sallie Mae too. Thank you Bill Clinton. You created this whore. You fix it. (For those of you who don't know, Sallie Mae's privatization was 99% under Clinton). It's all good. Sallie Mae is fixing to start hurting just like the rest of the loan companies, regardless if they lose their federal loan arm and gain that debt collection one. I didn't vote for Obama, but I hope he does something in favor of those of us who are paying on student loans. At least the feds are cool (you can lock in your rates!) Peace!

Anonymous said...

Sure the feds are "cool" until you aren't able to pay. They do NOT have to notify you of a wage attachment. Your checking,savings account or other assets could be frozen. Your income taxes would also be siezed and there's nothing you can do to stop it. They will get their money, regardless of circumstances. I would also agree with previous posts regarding going out and drinking. The same deadbeat losers that are on here complaining about a loan they CHOSE to take out, forbearances they CHOSE to take with clear cut disclosures about capitalizing interest and increasing the balance that were ACCEPTED because all they heard was "I don't have to pay my bill for x months". Cut back on expenses and act like an adult.

Ryan said...

Please please PLEASE! Consolidate you federal loans with FEDERAL DIRECT! This is str8 thru the fed government, no more bullshit with a private middle man, which is what Sallie Sae is! If you like me and work for a local/county government, or even work for a non profit or in education, you can get on the Obama plan and pay ten years, and the rest is forgiven! On the real tip you need to look into it!

Anonymous said...

Express your feelings of hate on my website... Ihatesalliemae.com

Anonymous said...

What happens if you live outside the US. I have no property in America, no car, no home, no bank accounts. I can't move back to America, so how can sallie mae touch me if I don't pay back my loan?

Anonymous said...

l0l i love what you u wrote and agree 100%. I havent't paid sallie mae a dime for the last 3 yrs...sallie mae and the whole gov. system can go have a big orgy and f**k each others brains out.

Anonymous said...

My son applied for Sallie Mae loans to attend a vocational school. Unfortunately the school provided little in the way of education and marketable skills. Also, financial crises prevented him from completing the remainder of his second year.
Since then he has had to settle for crappy jobs with crappy pay and now has a debt to repay that adds interest exponentially. My son tried to talk to them, when he could actually get hold of a human being and to try to find a middle ground of compromise such as how about a payment that is realistic with the cost of living and wages…all for naught. He was unable to eke out a living with his wages and when it came down to buying food or paying a student loan payment, he opted for the food. Sallie Mae's debt collection and customer service techniques border on criminal and cruel and unusual punishment. They make resolutions impossible and their monthly payment programs are disproportionate to my son's, to anyone's income I would surmise.
The debt was eventually turned over for collections and we all know there is a special hell for those folks their methods are inhumane, unethical and unreasonable. He now has to deal with the collections and the government in some form or fashion; needless to say he comes up against two very unreasonable and unmerciful entities. The government has their agenda and and collections has theirs and neither the twain shall meet.
He has currently lost his job and he decided to go back to school and was doing some research on the student loan debacle and discovered there might be some way that not only would he benefit from but that it would make it possible to make some head way into eventually paying back his student loan. He contacted the collection agency that holds the student loan and they told him that if he could consistently make monthly payments for 10 months his loan would go out of default and then he could reapply for student loans. He was also told that they would not attach his tax refund. Well that was a lie because they did and my son received a letter from the treasury department that they had indeed withheld and applied his measly tax refund to the student loan. So now I am thinking if they lied about that they might be lying about the “10 month” deal. He has enlisted my help in assisting him in making these monthly payments and I can’t afford them either. I am now though skeptical if making these payments will actually help him out of the “default status”, allowing him to indeed apply for more student loans to finance a better education for a better paying career. What’s the deal!

Anonymous said...

Some of you people are ridiculous. You borrow money from a lending company and then complain when they want their money back? It's not their problem that you picked a volitle career where you can't hold a decent paying job. Lets reverse the situation. (This is directed to koldflow) Imagine if I borrowed $10,000 from you then I lost my job and said I am not paying you back because I lost my job. Then 2 yrs later I still haven't payed you back. Im sure you would be hounding me all the time about your money. Their business is in getting payed back so why would they not want their money. They use interest rates to push you to pay them back sooner. If there was no penalty for not paying ontime then everyone will do it. If you can't afford the current payment then call them up and lower the payments. If it is still too much then maybe you don't need to buy that $200 pair of shoes or cancel the expensive cable bill. Learn to manage your money better and you will be fine. Everyone in America wants a handout or bailout but won't except responsibilities for their bad decisions. Who do you think takes the bill? Definately not the company. It will be tax payers or sallie mae will figure a way to milk the money out of someone else. Thats all I got to say about that.

Nigel Dyshawn Robinson said...

A lot of you ass holes do not know what situation a lot of these people are in and Sallie bitch ass Mae do not care to help people nor work with us. They don't even want to know if you have lost your job or any of your income as long as they get the pot you piss in,the shirt off your back and plenty of other things they can get. Don't you think a lot of Sallie Mae customers want them out of their live. We do not do this for the enjoyment. Sallie Mae makes it very hard for people to pay them, that is the reason why interest goes up every chance they get. Loans where not made to be payed off but to put a lot of people into debt and to make a lot more money than what was given to the customer.

Unknown said...

Save Our Students.com is an online petition dedicated to ending the outrageous loan repayment plans set up by private lenders.

Help us get signatures!

visit: http://www.saverstudents.com

Anonymous said...

It is really time to grow up people. You all chose this yourselves. You wanted to go to school and what did you think was gonna happen to the tens of thousands of dollars you borrowed to go to your school of choice? Disappear? There are plenty of options for repayment and postponment of your loans if ur in a financial bind, and if you dont call in acting like a total jerk you would get the assistance that you actually need, but who wants to help someone thats screaming at the top of their lungs about something that they did to themselves???? Its time to grow up, act like an adult, and pay your bills. You all signed up for this, no one twisted your arm, so instead of taking the time to blog/whine to abunch of immature people who feel they should go to for free for someone reason, straighten up, be an mature adult, call in and go over your options to make your payment more managable. There out there I promise, you just need to be a decent person to get the info you need and pay your loans, you all did this to yourselves so stop crying about it on this website and move on.

Anonymous said...

Hello all patrons ground down under Sallie Maes inept customer service.You can take your Federal student loans and consolidate them at direct loans. This is the government loan dept. for fed. loans.The people are friendly and helpful and actually answer all your question correctly to the best of their ability and will consult someone else if they don't know an answer.They will take all the interest rates, combine and average them to get an overall average fixed rate for the loan.The web is www.dl.ed.gov and the phone is 1-800-557-7392.Open M-F 5am - 530 pm Pacific Standard time.Also look on line for Senate bill S. 1102 "Fairness for struggling students act of 2011" I hope this helps some of you.
signed Anonymous but not from the evil SM.

Anonymous said...

Hey you gutless prick, signing Anonymous" if you're so straight & honest & pro sallie (screw you) mae, print your name COWARD!

Anonymous said...

Sallie Mae needs to realize that when a person makes payments, that those payments shoudl be based on your NET INCOME, not your GROSS INCOME. I don't know about you, but if I brought home my GROSS income, I wouldn't have problems making payments, especially with the enconomy the way it it. How many people bring home their GROSS INCOME? Wake up and smell the coffee, Sallie Mae. Get your head out of your ass.

Anonymous said...

Yeah, so I was the first in my family to go to college and I had no clue what I was doing or getting myself into. My school didn't offer any real advice, as they wanted to fill seats. So, I graduated with $98,000 in student loan debt in 2005. At 18.75% interest. Thank you Sallie Mae. I have now realized (after years of trying) that there is no way I can afford the $2,850 monthly payments and I am going into default. My loan now has a balance of $248,000. For all of you who say 'you brought this on yourself' and 'you should have asked more questions', please make yourself useful and spend your time advising young people of the perils of not asking those questions. I'm afraid it's too late for me to do anything but watch as my credit is tanked and my pride in my life is sucked dry.