Sam Raimi to Direct World of Warcraft?

Well, I don't have concept art. I don't have the firm release date, but I do know who is directing the WORLD OF WARCRAFT film and that is Sam Raimi. It will come out in trades later this week or next. But you can take this one to the bank. Sam is going to make a huge budget fantasy bit of unfuckingimaginable coolness - and it will be yanked from the WORLD OF WARCRAFT.

Now - isn't that the sort of Awesome we're supposed to get to kick start Comic Con with? I think so.

via aintitcool.com

Blurgh...

I love fantasy, I like Warcraft games (though I've never gotten into WoW) and I love Sam Raimi, but this is NOT a good fit. After seeing the genius of Drag Me to Hell this summer, I am more convinced than ever of one simple fact: Sam Raimi needs to get the hell out of his own way.

He's just NEVER going to be James Cameron or Steven Spielberg. He's a low-budget horror movie director at heart, and when he's trying to branch out, the results are usually not pretty. When he's making a tongue-in-cheek horror film, or an intimate character-driven thriller like A Simple Plan, you can just FEEL his enthusiasm leaping off the screen. In contrast, Spider-Man and For the Love of the Game are hollow and soulless.

The second Spider-Man is almost the exception to this rule. It's an above-average comic book film, though not one that I ever feel like revisiting or that I would rate with the best of the genre. But that's also the only film in that series where he got to kind of let his particular, idiosyncratic, wacky side loose. (I'm not sure WHAT'S going on in the third one...Maybe that's when Tobey Maguire let HIS idiosyncratic, wacky side loose.)

Essentially, the bigger the budget, the more Sam Raimi gets lost behind shiny special effects and plodding, lazy storytelling. And a World of Warcraft film, by definition, will have to be uber-massive.

Surely SOMEONE else could make some room for this in their schedule...I'd even throw, say, Zack Snyder or Ridley Scott into the mix before I'd hand this over to Sam Raimi.

It's not just because I think he tends to flub big-budget, major studio properties, but also the opportunity cost of NOT getting any more really awesome, really Sam Raimi-esque movies for the years he has to spend laboring over this leviathan.

Posted via web from LonHarris.com

Did I miss the 10:30 free pot giveaway?

More than 100 people lined up outside a marijuana dispensary in the San Fernando Valley this morning, lured by the offer of free cannabis for the first 100 patients.

The nonprofit dispensary in Canoga Park,  Roscoe's Compassionate Collective, advertised the offer last week in Kush L.A., a monthly cannabis magazine, with a pull-out coupon for patients with marijuana medical cards and updated prescriptions.

via latimesblogs.latimes.com

Only 100 people showed up? They must not have done a good job advertising. Later this week, at Comic Con, 100 people will queue up for a chance to get a free "Ben 10" hat. I can't imagine how well a free pot giveaway would go over down there.

This does go to prove my theory, though...The only way to get people to drive out to the Valley is to offer them a lot of free drugs. And even then, it's kind of a challenge, and a lot of them won't bother.

Posted via web from LonHarris.com

Intense footage of kids being pulled from a burning car

via mahalo.com

Hats off to the heroes who bravely ran in there and pulled this family out. They used metal pipes to break the windshield and pulled the mother and daughter to safety, then had to actually enter the car to pull out a four-year-old boy.

http://www.mahalo.com/kids-trapped-in-burning-car

Posted via web from LonHarris.com

George W. Bush: Teetotaler

To be sure, Obama is anything but a lush. But unlike his predecessor, former President George W. Bush, who refrained from cracking open a cold one in or out of the White House, Obama has enjoyed a tasty beverage or two since moving into the Executive Mansion.

via politico.com

What's missing from this paragraph comparing the propensity for our last two presidents to enjoy a spirited beverage? Hmm...

Oh, right, the fact that George W. Bush didn't drink because he once got shit-hammered on a daily basis, and the purging of alcohol from his system via Jesus was essentially the narrative he sold about himself to get elected. He didn't simply "refrain" from cracking open a cold one in the White House...If he had, it would have been a major national scandal.

Obama, though he has admitted to dabbling with the occasional substance in the past, has never admitted to any kind of alcohol problem, nor has he given us reason to suspect that he may have one. So I fail to see how his enjoying an occasional glass of wine or a margarita is worthy of a two-page news article.

(Also, if you believe the National Enquirer, which did have that John Edwards affair story way before anyone else, Bush was right back to his boozy ways while occupying 1600 Pennsylvania Ave., but that's beside the point.)

http://www.nationalenquirer.com/celebrity/63426

Posted via web from LonHarris.com

New "Mad Men" coming this August! Yes! Also, this new poster is outstanding.

via azizisbored.tumblr.com

Easily one of my favorite series of the moment. I've been rewatching Season 1 and it holds up tremendously. Can't wait for more Draper!

Posted via web from LonHarris.com

On TWIYT 53, we've got Megan Fox, the 2012 trailer, @shanedawson, MJ's spirit and the best middle frame in YouTube history

via youtube.com

Seriously, look at that middle frame! I'm going to make 100,000,000 imaginary dollars! Bwa ha ha ha!

Posted via web from LonHarris.com

The Daily Grind

via bustedcoverage.com

Here's the scenario...You're a mixed martial artist who has gained some level of notoriety. You're being interviewed for an Internet video. The host, a comedy lady, tells you she has an idea for a romantic comedy that would star the two of you...

So here's the question: Is it then appropriate to just start dry humping her? I mean, on the one hand, she's just making banter with you for the purposes of an entertainment show, apparently has no desire to engage in any sort of intimate or physical contact with you, and you're being filmed. But on the other hand...I mean, come on..."romantic comedy"...Am I right?

Posted via web from LonHarris.com

Finally, an efficient method of accessing space porn (via @chrisWhite)

The University of Colorado at Boulder is working with NASA to develop a new communications technology now being tested on the International Space Station, which will extend Earth's Internet into outer space and across the solar system.

Called Disruption Tolerant Networking, or DTN, the new technology will enable NASA and other space agencies around the world to better communicate with international fleets of spacecraft that will be used to explore the moon and Mars in the future.

via colorado.edu

Space Internet, eh? Just as long as there aren't any space comment threads. All it would take is one 12-year-old to call some alien a "fag" and we're got intergalactic war on our hands, people. You don't want that.

Posted via web from LonHarris.com

The NY Times switched to a hardcore porn rag so slowly, I barely noticed...

The pornographic movie industry has long had only a casual interest in plot and dialogue. But moviemakers are focusing even less on narrative arcs these days. Instead, they are filming more short scenes that can be easily uploaded to Web sites and sold in several-minute chunks.

via nytimes.com

Fascinating article I can only presume has been held back since 1997 about how porno movies are dispensing with 90 minute plotlines and just becoming collections of 8-10 minute scenes. You know, what with the Internet and all. Wait, did I say fascinating? I meant ludicrously inane. I get those two mixed up.

I'm all for human interest-y stories about pornographic filmmaking. This isn't me being a prude. It's just that this is not news. This is about as far from news as anything I have ever read in any newspaper, including Mervyn's inserts, "missed connection" classifieds and ads for pot doctors.

The inclusion of a plot in a porno doesn't even matter to THE PERSON WATCHING THE PORNO, let alone the public at large.

Besides, the Internet's been a popular place to find pornography for multiple decades at this point. The fact that streaming video isn't the best place to feature 10 minute interludes of bad acting and junior high AV Club-level effects work isn't exactly what you'd consider a Pentagon Papers-level scoop.

Posted via web from LonHarris.com

The Megan Fox-Michael Bay sex tape cost $400 million and includes the destruction of half of Los Angeles

Now, though, Page Six tells us just how Megan Fox nabbed the role in the first place. According to them, when Michael Bay auditioned her for the first Transformers, he actually made her wash his Ferrari while he filmed the whole thing. Yup. She washed his car. His Ferrari. While he filmed her. And that's how she got the role in Transformers. If you need anymore proof of just how perverted Hollywood is sometimes, look no further than Mr. Michael Bay. Oh, but it gets better ...

via scifisquad.com

I mean, it may sound a bit crude, but how else is Michael Bay even supposed to decide who to cast in his movies. The roles require no real acting ability, so you can't really have potential actresses read lines. And there are so many quick cuts, you never even get a clear look at them during the 260 minute running time, so a conventional screen test is pointless.

The best system would just be to put them in a bright room and spin around them quickly while throwing shards of metal and shrapnel in their direction. Anyone who survives and doesn't run out of the room screaming and begging for her life gets the part!

Posted via web from LonHarris.com

Patton Oswalt is a "Big Fan"

via youtube.com

Hopefully, this is better than Robert De Niro's film about an emotionally troubled sports fan. Cause that one didn't go so well.

Also, I'm dubious about any film Peter Travers dubs as "vital."

Posted via web from LonHarris.com

The "Scrumdiddlyumptious" remix tastes like snozzberries

via youtube.com

More demented genius from the man behind the Alice in Wonderland and Mary Poppins remixes. This is fast becoming my favorite YouTube channel.

Posted via web from LonHarris.com

Sarah Palin Announces Resignation as Governor (Part Deux)

We have accomplished so much and there’s much more to do, but my family and I determined after prayerful consideration that sacrificing my title helps Alaska most. And once I decided not to run for re-election, my decision was that much easier – I’ve never been one to waste time or resources.

via andrewsullivan.theatlantic.com

Seriously...what the hell is she talking about? This statement makes no sense. It implies that she made the decision to step down as governor (only after "prayerful consideration," mind you) BEFORE she made the decision not to run for a second term...Guh? Was there a time in which she considered quitting before the end of her first term and then running for a second? Cause...that's weird...

Also, I just LOVED this sentence:

"I’ve never thought I needed a title before one’s name to forge progress in America."

But...but...I thought that a community organizer didn't do anything, while a Governor had real responsibilities! It seems like that whole 2008 election was forever ago, but she said that less than 1 year ago!

Posted via web from LonHarris.com

Sarah Palin Announces Resignation as Governor (Video)

via tpmtv.talkingpointsmemo.com

Okay, I'm sorry...what the hell is she talking about? It sounds like she's afraid to pause after a sentence, lest any of us get a chance to actually think about what's being said, or reporters have a shot at asking questions. By the time she gets around to the "full-court press analogy," I sort of tuned out without realizing.

Posted via web from LonHarris.com

Leighton Meester, MJ, Billy Mays, @shiralazar a squirrel and me star in TWIYT #52. Take a look!

via youtube.com

This was one of the most challenging episodes I've ever had to write because of all the celebrity deaths. I want to reference them, because our show discusses what's buzzy and in the news, and this dominated everyone's attention all week...And I have to at least attempt to be funny, because that's what we do.

But I don't want to make people upset or offend anyone. That's not what I'm about. So I try to find a happy middle ground, a way to mock the situation or the coverage, without making light of people's genuine feelings of loss and sadness. Not easy.

Making fun of Leighton Meester and Asher Roth? Easy.

Posted via web from LonHarris.com

The Freak-Out Guy has won at least 60% of the Internet at this point

via youtube.com

Should we be concerned that there may not be enough Internet to divide between the rest of us?

Note for YouTube commenters: It doesn't matter if this is fake. It would still be awesome.

Posted via web from LonHarris.com

Local Reporter Talks about Michael Jackson, Refuses to Take Guff

via buzzfeed.com

So awesome...One of my top 3 favorite things about the Internet is how we all get to share in the glory of hilarious local news clips that otherwise would go unseen outside of a single urban area.

Posted via web from LonHarris.com

If you look at just one series of prints depicting raccoon dogs using with abnormally large testicles today...

via pinktentacle.com

Not really any way I can follow up on this...Except one:

Huh-huh...scrota...

Posted via web from LonHarris.com

Bearded, semi-frightening infomercial star Billy Mays dead at 50

via youtube.com

As if we hadn't lost enough beloved figures of American pop culture this week, pitchman Billy Mays was found dead this morning in his Tampa, Florida home. What is it with 50 year old guys dropping this week? That's only 20 years older than I am right now...Unacceptable...

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,529328,00.html

This is my favorite Mays remix video...I'll be playing it while pouring out a little Orange Glo is Mays' memory...Definitely look for a tribute on next week's TWIYT.

Posted via web from LonHarris.com

Ricky Gervais Invents Lying, Hangs Out with Tina Fey and Louis CK

via rayslucky13.com

When I first read about Ricky Gervais (easily among my favorite living comedians) making a film with Louis CK, Tina Fey, Christopher Guest, Jeffrey Tambor, Jason Bateman, Patrick Stewart, John Hodgman and Jonah Hill, I knew it would be something I'd want to see.

Somehow, I'm still blown away by how funny and fresh this movie looks. It's an odd, abstract premise (in a universe where everyone is purely honest at all times, one guy figures out that he can lie without consequences) and it sounds gimmicky, but the jokes certainly seem to work. It could just be a perfect fit for Gervais' acerbic, smugly superior persona.

Here's hoping that Gervais has created his third masterpiece. This is now officially among my most anticipated films of the year.

Posted via web from LonHarris.com