Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Renee Zellweger Has Issues

I mean, aside from looking like a constipated chipmunk.

Defamer today links to an story about Renee Zellweger's interview with the fine people of the appropriately-titled Bazaar magazine. (Yes, I realize it's a different meaning/spelling of "bizarre," but it's a fucking pun, so who cares?)

"It's weird to have fame precede you in any situation ... and I'm very proud of myself that I've not been to Betty Ford (Center) yet," Zellweger, 38, tells Harper's Bazaar. "Never say never!"

You'd think she'd kind of be over the whole "I'm famous" thing by now. Jerry Maguire was 1996, lady. If you're not over being the center of attention by now, you never will be. (Also, I can't help but think that if she was really this queasy about fame, she'd stop acting in massively-budgeted Hollywood star vehicles.)

Among her career achievements? "Learning what my boundaries are. That I've been able to stay out of the psychiatric wards despite the really bizarre exchanges I have on a daily basis," she says in the magazine's December issue, on newsstands Nov. 20.

A lot of actors would have no choice but to answer this question in an evasive fashion, because they don't have any big hits or popular films on their resumes to which they can refer. There's just no way Alyssa Milano's not going to feel embarrassed answering this question. I mean, she's most proud of her fine work on "Charmed"? Embrace of the Vampire? The classic Mark Wahlberg-Reese Witherspoon-decapitated dog thriller Fear?

Even though I'm not a fan, Renee Zellweger has got some monster hits to her credit. Sure, I don't think Maguire, Cold Mountain or Chicago are anything to be all that proud of, but a lot of people LOVE those movies.

So why give such a silly answer? You're most proud of not being committed to a psychiatric ward? Really?

It just keeps coming back to how WEIRD her life is because of her fame. I mean, how could it still seem so weird after 11 years? 1996! That's enough time to get used to pretty much anything. Does OJ Simpson still wake up every day and trip out about having gotten away with butchering his ex-wife? Does Courtney Love still talk constantly about how her rock star husband shot himself in the face? I haven't heard Magic Johnson mention the phrases "HIV" or "AIDS" in YEARS.

The year before Jerry Maguire made Renee Zellweger famous, Christopher Reeve fell off a horse. It took about as long for him to sustain his injury, begin recovery, become an international icon for strength amidst adversity, introduce the cause of stem cell research to the general American public and die gracefully as it has taken Renee Zellweger to adjust to life as a well-known actress. If she were John Travolta, Renee would have had, like, 6 comebacks already.

But the whining CONTINUES!

Zellweger prefers privacy to hanging out with the Hollywood crowd — in public at least. "I'm not a big scene girl," she says. "If I see the scene once a year, that's more than plenty."

The Bridget Jones star says an ideal night out could be a "really nice Christmas party."

I'm estimating Renee is one of 6-8 people left on the planet who use the term "scene" unironically.

"I love to go to somebody's house when it gets a little bit later and there's dancing and laughter and nobody's pointing at the weird actor-girl in the corner," says Zellweger, an Oscar winner for 2003's Cold Mountain.

See what I mean? The "actor-girl" thing is clearly an obsession. Even if the AP article about this Bazaar article were purposefully zeroing in only on the quotes in which she obsessed about fame, she would still be bringing the subject up too often. I mean, I find it kind of hard to believe that Renee Zellweger is being ostracized and made into a spectacle everywhere she goes. In West L.A., the only people I see getting this kind of treatment are Madonna, La Lohan and Paris. Everyone else pretty much gets left alone.

(For real! Once, I saw Bruce Willis, Demi Moore and Rumor Willis together at the Century City Mall, and everyone was making a tremendous effort not to gawk at them. Because gawking at celebrities is not cool.)

I mean, I'm sure it's different once you're being constantly recognized, but come on. This is overkill.

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