Shanks for the Memories

What better way to start a Monday than with an article about members of Bobby Brown's entourage being stabbed?

Two members of singer Bobby Brown's entourage were hospitalized for treatment of knife wounds after a fight at a restaurant early Monday, police said.

Brown, who has a history of drug and alcohol arrests, was apparently not involved, authorities said.

You mean, the dudes in Bobby's posse, who rely on Bobby Brown as a mealticket didn't implicate him in any crime in any way? I'm shocked.

Brown was at Justin's Restaurant and Bar performing during a weekly open microphone event when the people he arrived with got into a fight. Two members of Brown's group were either cut or stabbed, police detective D.L. Dixon said. The cause of the altercation was not immediately known.

Wait, wait, wait...He was performing during a weekly open microphone event? At a bar and grill in Atlanta? Bobby Brown? Why didn't he just join back up with those other New Edition guys and tour again or something. We all know he and Whitney could use some extra cash.

Seriously, Bobby Brown's doing open mic nights. That's embarrassing, wow. I mean, I've done some open mic nights in LA (comedy, not hip hop, although now that I think about it...) and it's not exactly like Oscar Night at Morton's in there. You're more likely to see a homeless junkie ranting about C.H.U.D. in the sewers than, say, Missy Elliott at one of those things.

"There was a lot of music and talking going on," Dixon said. "It could have been something as simple as a bump, you know, somebody bumped into each other."

Justin's Restaurant and Bar is owned by rapper and producer Sean "P. Diddy" Combs.

It could have been a bump. You know, you bump into some guy, he gets in your face, you repeatedly stab him with the knife you've conveniently brought with you to the local bar's open mic night...Happens to me all the time.

And this bar's owned by The Diddy? Man, P Diddles, let's get your boy Bobby some real work, what do you say? You're gonna give some of those psycho "Making the Band" broads their own album, and not the guy who sang "Cool It Now"? Come on!

So, anyway, Bobby's posse will likely be fine. Everything worked out! And I'm sure Bobby Brown will return to his peaceful, quiet, non-volitile life and never be heard from again.