Thursday, December 17, 2009

Tiger Not Out of the Woods Yet

Ha ha!  But seriously...

It seems that Mr. Woods has moved on to the next step in the Celebrity Scandal Method™ and decided to go to rehab.  But get this...it's for Vicodin, Ambien AND Sex Addiction!  I wouldn't have thought you could be addicted to both a sleeping pill AND lovemaking, as those two things seem sort of contradictory.  But a quick check of the ultimate authority on all medical issues - and of course I mean Wikipedia - confirms that Ambien produces side effects like "increased libido," "increased impulsivity," "altered thought patterns" and "impaired judgment and reasoning," which basically makes it sound like a rich, creamy Adultery Sauce.  I mean, how do you NOT cheat on your significant other when you're on a drug with those side effects?  It does everything but map the coordinates to the city's most exclusive escort services on to your iPhone.

Anyway, we at Mahalo are following the Tiger Woods Rehab story very closely, so stay tuned there for the latest.


Posted via email from Lon Harris

1 comment:

rednikki said...

Yeah, I've been on Ambien. Those side effects aren't so much a thing. I mean, sure, if you take four of them and then go out to a nightclub instead of going to bed, maybe...