Whither Wimmer?
You guys remember Equilibrium, that low-budget nightmare sci-fi from Kurt Wimmer, that introduced the world to a nonsensical martial-arts strategy called Gun-Kata? You don't? Come to think of it, I don't either. The only things I remember about that film are that I hated it, gun-kata doesn't make any sense because it relies on the notion that you can dodge bullets and Christian Bale kills a shitload of puppies.
Well, Equilibrium won some praise from some dim-witted, easy to please online nerd collectives, and Wimmer has moved up in the world. He drops has latest load, Ultraviolet, on the US this February. (Just in time for Valentine's Day! How sweet!)
Check out the trailer here at Underground Films Online. Then consider how oddly like the extremely recent Aeon Flux it all seems. Note the similarity to the voice-over from Domino ("my name is Domino Harvey, I am a bounty hunter" vs. "my name is Violet, I live in a world you may not understand."). Enjoy the extremely lame catch phrases ("Are you mental?). Note the presence of D-level Eastern European soap opera actors in a number of the major roles. Consider sending John Woo to Gitmo as punishment for unleashing the "slo-mo-diving-across-a-room-firing-two-guns" shot on the world. Wonder why every trailer for every film containing any action whatsoever must, by law, feature obnoxious nu-metal on the soundtrack. Reminisce fondly about the wit and subtlety of The Transporter 2.
And then, weep, because this will probably be a big hit, paving the way for a decade or more of vapid, mindless, sub-Uwe Boll wankery from this Kurt Wimmer guy.
4 comments:
Not gonna lie...I love equilibrium...yes, it makes no sense...yes its a b-movie...yes its a rip off of 1984..yes christian bale kills lots of puppies...but i love it for what it is, the same way i love universal soldier...but the line that all my friends absolutly hate the most in equilibrium is "i will redouble my efforts"
My problems are definitely more with the "making no sense" and manipulative "puppy killing." I don't mind a nice B-sci fi movie now and again, including "Universal Soldier," which has a lot of nostalgia value for me.
I watched Equilibrium in a hostel in Bangkok, while my travel companions and I recovered from severe sunburn.
Delirious from the heat and sated on banana milkshakes, I watched the movie in a fugue state. It was truly fantastic. I regret not a moment of the experience (except the severe stomache cramps that resulted from the liquid milkshake diet).
Even this gun-kata, which you call a nonsense martial-art, has been valuable to me. I use the same blind slo-mo motions while doing household chores. Shelving plates and cups behind my back, without even looking, is a liberating experience.
Just the other day I killed my first puppy--truly superb....
The film should come with an advisory:
To be watched ONLY when fatigued from a combination of extreme Thai heat and rich banana milkshakes.
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