More on Bill O'Reilly's Tireless Crusade Against Taste and Decency

Maybe the best thing about Bill O'Reilly is his complete and utter lack of self-awareness. Because he doesn't listen to anyone else's side of a conversation ever, because he in fact purposefully avoids having to hear anything negative about himself, his views or his program, his mind exists in a total vacuum. The only ideas bouncing around in there are his own, and he's oblivious when they are idiotic and making him look like a complete asshat.

Take his recent comments about San Francisco, which I discussed briefly here. Here's the short version: Terrorists are encouraged by O'Reilly to blow up San Francisco, in particular the Coit Tower, because the citizens of the Bay Area recently voted to ban military recruitment on public school campuses.

I know...Those unAmerican bastards! How could they refuse a policy that would encourage unscrupulous recruiters desperate to meet their quota to solicit impressionable teenagers to join the military during mandatory sessions set aside for learning? Didn't they hear about freedom being on the march?

Anyway, a few wacky left-wing "moonbats" (to borrow noted bug-faced creature Michelle Malkin's phrase) think that it's wrong for a TV news anchor to encourage organized violent actions against a large American city.

So, after a few days of taking a beating on the blogosphere for his unique blend of intolerance and outright stupidity, Bill went on a conservative SF radio show and voiced his response:

What I said isn’t controversial. What I said needed to be said. I’m sitting here and I’m looking at a city that has absolutely no clue about what the world is. None. You know, if you had been hit on 9/11 instead of New York, believe me, you would not have voted against military recruting. Yet the left-wing, selfish, Land of Oz philosophy that the media and the city politicians have embraced out there is an absolute intellectual disgrace.

What he said isn't controversial? He suggested that al-Qaeda should blow up San Francisco. I don't know what's worse...an American openly wishing terrorism against a major American city, or an American claiming that it's not controversial to do so.

Clearly, the "it's not controversial" argument wasn't going to be enough to satisfy everyone. And this is really where Bill O'Reilly rises above the rest of his mindless pundit fellows and into the realm of Super Genius. Most pundits, upon realizing they had made a gaffe and said something inappropriate, would just pretend they hadn't said it and move on. When pressed about the incident publicly, maybe they'd intimate that their words were taken out of context, or twisted to suit some other purpose, or something.

But not Bill. Bill, constitutionally, cannot admit error or back down from a point. He physically can't. He's so pompous, he seriously believes that everything he's ever said is correct and sensible and right and proper. More than that, he says things that need to be said.

So, all that was needed was a back-up secondary explanation for his ludicrous, hateful commentary. No longer was it "not controversial." Now, asking terrorists to please kill all those librul latte-slurping freaks in San Francisco was merely a "satirical riff."

Oh, well, if it's just a wicked bit of mockery, how can anyone be upset about that? I mean, after all, Bill O'Reilly is one of the greatest and most infamous wits of the modern age, is he not? A regular Oscar Wilde, but you know...slightly less gay.

Unfortunately, it seems this secondary, back-up explanation is still not enough to silence Bill's left-wing critics. So he has trotted out the extremely rare (and might I add, wily) tertiary emergency explanation for his lack of decorum...

Ready for it? I warn you...if you're enjoying a delicious beverage while reading the blog here, you may wish to fully swallow before reading the next paragraph, as its sheer idiocy may cause you to spew Diet Cherry Vanilla Dr. Pepper all over your monitor.

Some far left internet smear sites have launched a campaign to get me fired over my point of view. I believe they do this on a daily basis. This time the theme is O’Reilly is encouraging terrorist attacks. Unbelievably stupid. Not unusual with these guttersnipes.

You see, this whole thing is the work of left-wing smear sites trying to get Bill fired over his point of view. He's just a guy with a point of view! Why can't we let him live!

Because I am a lefty, and because I bash O'Reilly regularly on my Internet site, I am going to go ahead and assume Bill thinks of me as a "guttersnipe," which is pretty awesome. If I only had better graphical designing abilities, I might make a little logo or something to stick on the masthead. But, I don't...

And, finally, Bill resorts to a form of neo-McCarthyism...posting an enemies list of all sites who have unfairly maligned him for wishing the sweet release of death on everyone from Northern California.

I’m glad the smear sites made a big deal out of it. Now we can all know who was with the anti-military internet crowd. We’ll post the names of all who support the smear merchants on billoreilly.com. So check with us.

Yeah, Bill, very believable. I'm sure you're totally glad that major, popular sites on the Internet continually posts transcripts of all the dumb crap you say, so that others can mock it incessantly. I bet you're also super-excited that your Fox News cohort made that loofa-themed phone sex call public.