Bahrainiac

I try not to talk about Michael Jackson too much on here, because so many blogs are already goofing on Wacko Jacko and I feel like it's a bit overdone. But I just had to comment on the latest news that Michael may be moving to Bahrain.

I just can't imagine what it must feel like to be so humiliated and shamed in one's home country that you'd ahve to actually move to an entirely separate continent. I mean, imagine that...No matter where you go in all of North America (or, really, the Western Hemisphere), you're an outcast and a laughingstock. The only solution is to buy 14 acres in BFE and hang out with your sheik friend.

Then there's this CBS News story about the possibility of Jackson's move.

The New York Post quotes sources as saying Jackson has bought 14 acres of land in Bahrain, near the palace home of a sheik who's a good pal of his. The paper says its sources say Jackson has enjoyed his vacation in Bahrain because he can dress in the same way as the local residents and go out without being noticed.

Okay, who can find the two ridiculous statements in that excerpt?

(1) "he can dress in the same way as the local residents"

For real? The average citizens of Bahrain walk around in red sequined military coats, black leather jackets covered in zippers, 1940's style fedoras and PJ bottoms? Was their nation originally settled by glam rockers or gay mobsters or something?

(2) "he can go without being noticed"

So, contrary to what we all learned in high school, Bahrain is apparently located on Venus. Because there's nowhere on Earth that Michael Jackson can blend into the local population.