I have come down with writer's block. Obviously, not blogging writer's block. I never get blogging writer's block. If I can't come up with something good to write, I'll just wait for a Fox News anchor to say something stupid. And that never takes too long.
No, I have screenwriter's block. That is, I have a great idea for a script, and all the characters basically figured out. But I don't have a good ending. It's a crime/con movie, you see, so the ending is kind of really really important. Imagine Usual Suspects if McQuarrie and Singer hadn't figured out the ending. It'd just be some weird direct-to-video release about a gimp on a Hungarian boat.
So I've spent the entire day so far working at the video store, thinking of a good way for my script to end. Maybe it should be a bloody showdown. Or maybe it should be one of those funny endings where there's a twist at the last minute that leaves everything ambiguous. Or maybe I should just have Tobey Maguire admit to Kirsten Dunst that he's Spider-Man and have her not care at all and still want to date him. Unless someone has used that one already.
I've got to go back to work right now, so there's no time to elaborate on my quandry. But just know, I'll be puzzling this one out in my head all day. I guess it makes sense that I can't think of an excellent criminal scheme without any holes. If I could, I'd probably just go ahead and be a criminal. A lack of creativity's the only thing keeping me out of that lucrative field as it is.
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