Tuesday, February 08, 2005

Crushed By Deez Nuts In Yo Mouth

My friend Matt stops by the blog for the first time ever and leaves me with a funny link. That's fucking classy. Nicely done.

Anyway, he turned me on to Gizoogle. Now, now, I know what you're thinking. Because I can read minds...through the Internet! Anyway, you're thinking, "Oh, this is some lameass website that plays on the incredibly tired 'fo shizzle' routine Snoop's been peddling around UPN for the better part of the last decade." And you would be right. Also, you're thinking "I would like a sandwich." Or maybe that's just me.

So, yeah, Gizoogle just spits out Google searches, but instead of the usual "pulled quote from the website," Gizoogle shoots back a translation of the site's test into Snoop Dogg Speak.

So, a search for, say, the phrase "Napoleon Dynamite" brings this up:

Napoleon Dynamite - Cizzay Crizzay Reviews, Plizzot Summary, Comments, Discussion, Taglines, Traila, Gangsta Photos, Showtimes, Link ta Official Site, Fan Sites

Ha ha. And a search for "Crushed By Inertia" brings up stuff that reads like this:

Crushed by Inertia . I started yo shit and i'll end yo' shit. thursday, january 20, 2005 fo' rizeal. if you already president, why d-ya need ta get inaugurated again?

Which isn't that different from how I normally write. Except perhaps that the grammar is slightly improved and there aren't as many commas.

I'm just hoping that this goofy website finally gives us an opportunity to stop using this dumb mock-ghetto slang and go back to our normal way of talking, with far fewer zzzz's. Can I now officially request that we never make another movie where an old white guy dresses up like a gangsta and starts saying he's the shiznit? Please? I beg of you?

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