Disturbing Strokes
via youtube.com
I'll never be able to watch this show the same way.
Thursday, April 16, 2009
Shorter George Will: "Men should dress like Fred Astaire! Video games rot your brain! Now get off my lawn!"
Denim is the infantile uniform of a nation in which entertainment frequently features childlike adults ("Seinfeld," "Two and a Half Men") and cartoons for adults ("King of the Hill"). Seventy-five percent of American "gamers" -- people who play video games -- are older than 18 and nevertheless are allowed to vote. In their undifferentiated dress, children and their childish parents become undifferentiated audiences for juvenilized movies (the six -- so far -- "Batman" adventures and "Indiana Jones and the Credit-Default Swaps," coming soon to a cineplex near you). Denim is the clerical vestment for the priesthood of all believers in democracy's catechism of leveling -- thou shalt not dress better than society's most slovenly. To do so would be to commit the sin of lookism -- of believing that appearance matters.
Jesus, this guy needs help. It's like one of those rare, asexual outbursts from Humbert Humbert. Maybe people like jeans because they are comfortable, George, and they wear them around town because they're not overly concerned with impressing your ignorant, crotchety old ass. Now go have an Ensure and a smile and leave the observational comedy to under-85's, anyone really whose understanding of American pop culture extends beyond the fucking Howdy Doody show.
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
Did you ever know that you're my hero?
This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.
"Transformers 2" is totally Michael Bay's Best Movie Evar!!!!!
via firstshowing.net
Wait...so it's better than "Bad Boys 2"? Is that even possible? How many large Cuban villages are decimated by brash, cocky American police officers in this film? Because, I'll be honest, post-BB2, that's my barometer of film quality.
Zooey Deschanel's Cotton Commercial is Annoying
via buzzfeed.com
Oooooh, she's so adorably indie! She still shops for records! She wears vintage dresses!
Citizen Kane in stunning 3D!
via ironicsans.com
If you have 3D glasses handy, this actually looks pretty good. (Yeah, we have 3D glasses sitting around in Mahalo HQ. Thanks, Eliot!)
Also: Way #13869 that you know people on the Internet are dumb...The blogger had to note at the bottom of the post that a 3D "Citizen Kane" is not coming to an IMAX near you.
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
Blitzen Trapper in a basement
via pitchfork.com
If you haven't been listening to Blitzen Trapper, you're doing yourself a great disservice. I highly recommend 2008's "Furr."
Japanese "Sideways"
via cinematical.com
Because stories about drunk losers who are stuck in the past and their sleazy, self-involved college buddies are universal.
Friday, April 10, 2009
300 Million for a new "Tron" movie? What else do I get with that?
The middle of an article from the Vancouver Sun contains this ditty: "Vancouver post-production units are salivating at the prospects presented by the Disney remake of Tron, which carries a whopping $300 million budget and opportunities aplenty for effects and digital polish." If Avatar's big price tag was a typo, I can only assume this is as well. It's the only thing that makes sense!
via cinematical.com
I mean, the original looks cool, and features Jeff Bridges. But come on. Are there THAT many people who will even recognize the name?
http://www.cinematical.com/2009/04/10/is-disney-really-spending-300-million-on-tron-2
Thursday, April 09, 2009
Nicolas Cage watches The Wicker Man
via youtube.com
He can't have ever really watched this movie, right? It's excruciating for me to watch, and I was utterly uninvolved with the production. I can't imagine how it would feel to see YOURSELF up there on the big screen, punching old ladies wearing bear suits.
Wednesday, April 08, 2009
Awkward Boners are Back!
This site has changed the way I look at the Internet. Not boners, though. I still try not to look directly at those, if I can help it.
Truly, You Have a Dizzying Intellect (via @iidiocracy)
A man faces an arson charge after telling authorities he wasn't thinking when he decided to use gasoline for cleaning up his apartment, and then tossed a lit cigarette into a pile of gas-soaked cushions and clothes.
via justnews.com
Tuesday, April 07, 2009
These Cats Look Like Wilford Brimley
via gatoisland.com
What more is there to say? These five cats distinctly resemble Liberty Medical pitchman and "Thing" star Wilford Brimley. Enjoy.
Thursday, April 02, 2009
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
No One Does It Like You
via pitchfork.com
Really trippy, insane video for this amazing Department of Eagles song. Enjoy.
Rosario Dawson and Zoe Bell Make Out at the Streamy Awards!
via youtube.com
I see your girls kissing and raise you CELEBRITY girls kissing!
Okay, they don't so much "make out" as kind of nuzzle, then hug. But still, if THIS video doesn't get some views on YouTube, I just don't know what to believe in any more.
Evil Disney Princesses
via gunaxin.com
Fun art depicting Disney princesses if they turned all dark and twisted. I mean...beyond just filling little girls' heads with the twin aspirations of being beautiful and marrying to a rich guy. Actual rip-your-face-off evil.
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